god forbid my jump roping disturbs your sleep.

It's a work in progress, this whole "chin up! push forward!" business, but I really am trying. 

However, today, when my little pile of problems and anxiety collided with my hormones (awesome!) it created a perfect atmosphere for a mini-melt down WHICH I was trying to productively ward off by exercising... when I saw a mouse scurry across the kitchen floor.

Game over. 

I'll try to be more positive tomorrow.

LNDT: Eyes Gallery

Eyes Gallery is the shop located just next door to Jim's cheesesteaks on South Street, and it's a hard one to miss. The mirror and tile mosaic front is an eye catcher to all passers-by, and the interior is no disappointment to the ones who choose to step through the florescent pink front door.

Ask me what half the stuff in this place is, I couldn't tell ya, but the staff sure can and the ones I spoke to were very friendly and approachable. In fact, on most days the owner, Julia Zagar, herself is there and will tell you about her years spent in the Peace Corps with her husband in South America and how all this got started.

The building was once the home of Mrs. Zagar and her husband, Isaiah (Mr. Magic Gardens himself) so the walls, ceilings and floors display the unique mosaic folk art that Mr. Zagar is known for.

There's and upstairs and a downstairs and every inch is filled with South American textiles, Day of the Dead décor and carved, painted, or paper machéd nick nacks.

This is a shop that you could probably visit a hundred times and continually discover things you didn't see before. It's a great location for inspiration if nothing else!

starting now... again.

Such long gaps between posts. Fun! 

You know, sometimes things just don't go as planned and the idea is to not give up and keep pushing forward, even through the most difficult of times. Example: Ten days ago my mom called to tell me that my grandpa had died.

Without getting super-sappy right here, let me just say that I loved my grandpa. He was accomplished and smart and active and once you got to know him, you'd find that he was actually pretty funny too. The dry wit type. His death wasn't a gigantic shock seeing as he was 84 and his health had been declining for a few years. Also, he specifically said back in October that he was going to die a week into the new year, so thank you for getting us somewhat prepared, grandpa!

The original point of this post, however, is to say that this past week+ has been super busy and stressful and very draining. I guess this time it was legitimately so, but when I think about it, the week before that was super busy and stressful and draining with good reason too. And oh look, the week before THAT was super busy and stressful and draining too! So last night when I was awake with a monster headache because it was 2am and my brain didn't want to go to sleep, I really, really decided to stop being like that. Seeing my life as nothing but "Busy. Stressful. Draining." Or being very "ohmygosh I can't handle this all" or "how am I going to make it through this week?" because that right there ALONE is wearing me out. And I'm done being worn out at 27. Actually no one is the right age to act like that on a daily basis.

Yes, things have been non-stop this past year, but my (self-diagnosed, probably-not-really-existant) ulcer is only going to subside if I take on the huge task of making a permanent attitude adjustment... something I have been consciously putting off doing for years now because it takes so. much. TIME!

I know, I'm pathetic. Its embarrassing.

I guess it takes big events, like deaths, to make you do some navel-gazing and reevaluate what you really want out of life. Especially if you haven't been the biggest fan of "life" for quite awhile. But that's what I'm doing, really focusing. Figuring out what it's going to take and then making the changes. And seriously, it's about damn time.

I'll keep you updated.

that time i learned how to knock on wood.

As expected, the old laptop DIED. Death! Death to my social life. Death to my job progression. Death to my sanity. I made do with the crappy internet on my phone until a replacement was purchased (slash gifted!), but I'm not sure how people do it as a way of life. I mean, people do that right? Live without this? Intentionally? And drive horse-drawn carriages or something? WHY.

Of course, it was nice for a minute to have a breather from all that, but it meant that once I got it back I had a ton of catching up to do. Everyone wants a piece of my time lately and there has not been enough Me to go around! Hectic and stressful has been the story of my life lately, but it's all because I'm moving on to bigger and better things. Making sure I have the life I want to live on the right tracks.

electronic wishing.

I am just waiting for my laptop to die. Its… I don’t know, 5 years old? Geezer old in the digital world. The battery life maxes out at 2 minutes tops, necessitating the power cord, which precariously teeters on the prong thing that is in the actual laptop. Technically speaking. Anyway, over the course of any given time of laptop use, if I so much as breath too hard or type with any greater force than a mouse, the cord slips from its position and my laptop transfers to battery power.

The screen dims. I have small heart palpitations.

This thing is seriously hanging onto life by a wish and a prayer. I thought for a millisecond about going out to buy a new one on Black Friday but that turned out to not be a possibility. If I had deeper pockets, I would go into BestBuy to purchase a laptop and end up leaving with armfuls of other items that I also need to upgrade. Items with lots of dollar signs on the tags...

food coma.

 

I hope everyone had a tasty holiday!

I definitely enjoyed the few days of non-stop activities and the massive amounts of food! It's really been one of those weeks that feels like it should have been two. Work, nights out with friends, cooking with mom, and spending lots of time with visiting family... how did we manage to fit everything in? Of course, its all in preparation for the whirlwind approaching that is December. I have psychotically mixed feelings towards the holidays, but that is a topic for another time! 

-See ya in the A.M.

because i can.

Part of living in a fun new apartment would be to actually LIVE in it, right? That's not been happening much since the move-in. After working overtime almost every day and then spending more than an hour in traffic, this place pretty much exists for me to crash in before I have to wake up and do it all over again.

I mean, I'm still not totally unpacked.

And I was not prepared at all to deal with the laundry list of problems that have been coming at me nonstop this month, but you know what a great fix is for a drained spirit and a squashed brain? 15 hours of sleep. Long, heavy unconsciousness that was in no way drug-induced. Excessive, yes, and it solved absolutely none of my problems, but sometimes you gotta recharge the batteries!